A little note to some world changers: A few of my thoughts from Camp.

Oh Goodness...
Life is brilliant and there are moments, little pockets of time that make you acutely aware of this fact. If I ever doubt that serving God is the most amazing, joyful adventure ever I really only need to remember last week and I am 100% sure that doubt will go away.

If any of you know me, you know that I love camp. I don't really love TO camp, but I love camp ministry so, so very much. It's such an amazing opportunity to have the full attention of youth, to pour your heart out into people you may never see again, and to watch God literally transform lives within a weeks notice, or within a moments notice, for that matter. The King of all camps, as far as I'm concerned, is High School camp. Because if a 14-18 year old is giving up a whole week, no cell phone, no tv, no sports or work for a whole week in the prime time of freedom...you know they are serious about growing in the Lord. Which totally sets them up to see amazing things. God loves to encounter the hungry. And if I've ever seen a group of hungry 'kids' (sorry yall, that's what you are to me now) it was last week.

It all started a few months ago, when the Lord really began to stir in my heart about camp this year. After having been involved in some way at Bible Memory for 15 years I was super bummed last year that I wasn't able to be at any camps. Looking at finances and circumstances it seemed the same was going to be again for me this year. That is, until some very amazing people stepped up big and displayed the extravagant nature of God for me. To say I was excited would be an understatement. I literally ran around my deck yelling quite passionately.


But....this blog is not about me....
This blog is about the most amazing people on the face of the planet. The people that reminded me, once again, why I am alive. The people who are not going to be world changers, but already are. This blog is about the 127 campers from BMC Indiana High School Camp. I woke up yesterday and realized that I missed all of you. As I sit typing this I am weeping at how proud I feel, at how honored I am to have spent a week with you. I think I speak on behalf of all of the staff that were present last week in saying that we cannot explain how much we are certain that what began in you last week will never be stopped.

Your willingness to go where the Lord was leading last week, even if you had never experienced it before was so fun to watch. Your hunger, your passion, your humility, and your love for God and the Word makes me extremely aware that there are very good things ahead not only for you, but the people the Lord puts in your life. If you continue to press into Him, to seek out the truth in the Word, and to live the full gospel of Christ out in your life you are in for the ride of your lives!

Never forget that Christ died that you may be filled with the fullness of Him, with the fullness of His Spirit, and with power. Power to serve in every area of your life. So that the Blind will see, the deaf will hear, and so that there may be freedom for those held in bondage. You are filled with the same power that raised Christ Jesus from the grave...so what can't you do? What is impossible for the God that lives inside of you and that wants to be released through YOU to the people around you? Nothing. And I am so excited that so many of you came to this realization last week.

Where will He take you? I am so excited to see the journey He takes you on in the next years of your life as you submit everything to Him. Salvation is free, but the Kingdom will cost you everything. And it is oh, SO worth it. If you are not a camper and you're reading this, let me talk to you for a second. I know that we live in dark and troubled days. I know that things are happening everywhere that are hard and evil and unjust. But let me tell you something...as I stood before each of these last week I can honestly say that the Lord is totally winning. It's not even close. Things are getting lighter, getting better at the same time. And I will not be swayed from my position in that thinking. These 127 are my proof. God has a solution....and I know what their faces look like. They are brilliant. They are coming back to right focus...on a God who saves. On a God who loves. On a God who heals. On a God who cares. On a God who doesn't care about denominational traditions, boundaries, or men's egos. On a God who just wants to passionately pursue people with the help of us, His church. On a God who has already won, and wants us to win too.

'Kids' you've got it. Run. Keep your eyes locked on the Author of your faith. Keep your focus up on Him, establishing His kingdom everywhere you go. We're so excited for you....but it's yours to take and run with. What do you want to see happen this year?

-Focus-

-Lara-

My Song of Redemption

This lover of my soul has looked at me and said yes. He's said yes, and this yes completely destroys my defenses, shatters my walls. Because His yes? It wasn't just said over His shoulder in passing, being lost into the airwaves. No...His yes was said face to face.

My life stopped. The yes, it shaped a turning in my life. It resounded in eternity. That moment that I said yes to Him, and Him to me, has shaped every moment since then, and my life reflects the yes. I live in anticipation of the yes, in celebration of the yes, and in full awareness of what this yes means. 

Ah, but He was the instigator. Even while my life and heart and mind screamed No and hurled rejection in His face, His kindness calmly whispered yes in my ear, even in my darkest moments. He was not wavered by my neglect of Him, at my obvious abuse of His compassion. He was always there, hovering and waiting in joyful anticipation of the day I would whisper through the strength I could muster through my tears, a quiet, 'yes.' 

Louder and louder my yes has become! With new mercies every day fueling my fire. His joy has unlocked my voice and I sing my song of redemption from the rooftops. I live expectant and aware that He longs to continue to say yes to me, for He cannot resist His children. And there is a passion and excitement building in me to see others finally get it as well. And if I have the honor,  to usher them into their own Yes.

Beautiful. Beautiful one. Irresistable. Undeniable. Unexplainable. Joyful. Hopeful. Great. All that's good. We cannot stay away from you. You have captured our hearts. One day, all that see you will turn their hearts, and their affections, and with their whole hearts will say, YES!

-L-

Peace and Freedom

There's a sweet ecstasy when you realize you're thinking about absolutely nothing because you're aware that you don't need to. When you're aware of God's peace because it's so captured your heart and you give your mind over to it. 

Peace that passes understanding, what a beautiful thing. What a glorious, marvelous thing. There's almost nothing that leaves me aware of Him more than when I should not be feeling joy, and that's what I'm feeling. When I know that I should be feeling sad and instead I've never felt more alive. When I should be scared and yet one word from Him silences my fears. When I want answers to questions I've had for years and yet a simple, "It will be ok, Lara" from Him is totally fine with me.

Peace that calms raging seas.

Because, have you ever truly stopped and thought about the implications of the fact that Jesus didn't stay in the grave? I often find myself getting to the cross, but forget to truly experience the resurrection! I mean, really...have you thought about it? Like, sat and allowed yourself body, soul and spirit to be completely wrecked by it? I'm almost undone every time.

Because Jesus didn't stay dead, we now live FROM victory, not searching FOR it! It's already over! We just now have to live not only aware of it, but transformed by it! I don't know...it's just good news that I cannot possibly get over, and hope I never EVER do!

There's something that clicks inside of you when you realize exactly what Jesus still being alive means. There's something even more powerful that happens when you realize that the SAME power that rose Jesus from the dead now LIVES inside of you! That. Is. Crazy.

I'm pretty sure that when Jesus walked out of the tomb, He was laughing.

And I'm pretty sure that when we are aware of these implications, of Jesus being alive, we will live and walk in freedom and in peace.



Freedom, it tastes so sweet, it feels like life undiluted.
Freedom, you've raptured me, captivating my mind till I'm paralyzed in joy.

Oh, there's nothing left to fear, no worries, not a care when I'm standing here with you. 
You've taken over me, completely over me, and I am finally set free. 

Mysteries

It really has been too long once again. And once again I am lacking the creative touch that I feel is needed to start these random musings. But I feel that a blog is due before my trip to the other side of the world. I leave for Lebanon in 4 days. I am beyond excited. If I could leave right now, I would go without a suitcase, I'm that ready. But alas, 3 days of work, 2 days of school and a list to get done as long as a yard stick still stand in my way. And so I've been working extremely hard to focus the last few days. To focus on not getting my suitcase out, to not allow my mind to go to the endless things I think I have to remember or I will die (after 2 weeks? What has Westernism done to my brain!) 
But most of all I've been focusing really hard (which I need to do at all times) on getting every single gem I can out of this week. I would hate to miss a jewel, a treasure that The Lord has hidden for me here and now because I'm too focused on the there and then of the next season. Oh, how often am I guilty of that?! And let me tell you, since this has been my focus, I have had some of the most precious moments with The Lord. The most precious that I've had. 

Really, I didn't write to write about any of that (surprise!). I did, however want to share some thoughts I quickly jotted down today during worship. It was such a rich time and I just wanted to challenge you with it. It's core to who I am, and I'm telling you, it's truth. 

-By embracing and being excited about the mysteries of God, the things not understood, you are declaring the mightiness of God and opening yourself up to receive the beautiful things that are unknown to those who are constantly in need of an explanation. Sometimes you just have to say 'no' to needing to understand everything and say 'yes' to an all-knowing, all-powerful God that created you before the world knew of you. The highest form of trust you can show Him is to stand in the midst of a situation that makes no sense and worship as if you do. I have a high value for reason and thinking- i love to strategize and find new things, but I run into the mysteries of God. There has been nothing else that leaves me in awe of His vastness more than seeing something from Him that makes no sense to me but speaks of His glory. When I run into Him and make Him my complete focus and lay down my need to understand, I find that it puts me in a position where I let Him be my reason. He can show me how and what to think. I think that too often we miss what God is doing because we are expecting something specific and God is doing or saying something else. When we are growing in deeper and more intimate relationship with him we should constantly be in situations where we are learning something new from and about him. I worry if we feel that we have Him figured out. He is a beautiful, creative, fun, good God that loves to talk and meet with His kids. I pray that we can rediscover that more and more as we grow in awe of Him. 

"There's no place I'd rather be, than here in your love, here in your love."

I think that's all for now. Goodnight from Redding-land. 
Lara

Absolutely No Less:

Blog. Blog. Blog. Blog.

I really have no way to creatively start blogs. It's just not an art that comes easily for me. But, I am feeling the need to write, perhaps a bit randomly, but definitely straight from my heart.

This past week has been a battle for me. Since being in Redding God has been challenging me in this phrase a lot: "Lara, become who you are fully. No more than you are, but absolutely no less." I've come to realize, just as i think every human is designed to realize, that without Him I am nothing, but with Him, really there are no limits. Even with all of the victories I've walked through, with all of the breakthrough I've seen both internally and externally I still finding myself sabotaging myself. I have no problem with the "no more than you are" part (in the wrong way, thinking less of ourselves is SO amazingly easy to do!) but I have a really hard time with the "but absolutely no less."

Absolutely no less:
I'm pretty sure that God has created us each to be amazing. To shine, and be the light of the world. To carry Him well, and to love extravagantly. Why is it then, that so many Christians walk around thinking that it's somehow a really bad thing to really shine? To really carry the love of God in an extravagant way that attracts people to Him? Why is it that we grow up thinking that if we truly believe in ourselves that somehow it's some terrible sin? One of our pastors really put it in perspective for me this week. He said, "Confidence operates out of the phrase, 'What can I give?' while arrogance operates out of the phrase, 'what can I get?' As long as you have that in perspective, go for it!" This helped voice something for me...

I know that I carry a strength and resilience that is very unique and that not everyone can say they have.  I can naturally do a lot for a 24 year old woman. But I also know that I am a little girl at heart. I love to wear pretty things, make up silly songs, giggle, hope for the impossible and dance and adventure through life. I have for so long, walked through life thinking that because I was one, I couldn't be the other. That if I was completely strong, that no one would like me because they would think I wouldn't need anything, that no guy would ever be gutsy enough to even attempt to break in to my life. But while it's true that I can do a lot on my own, I'm also fully aware that I love to be taken care of. I realized this week that I have full permission to be fully both. That just because I'm strong, doesn't mean that I'm not soft. And just because I'm soft, doesn't mean that I'm weak. My process of learning how to be 'absolutely no less than fully myself' has included figuring out that while I am fully a daughter, I am also fully aware of the strength the Lord has given me as a gift to carry with grace, intensity and extravagant love to the people of this world.

I don't know where I'm going with all of this except to say that I think it's time we started living up to our full potential. Not some strange, mustered confidence...but true reliance and confidence in the one who gave us the very things we have to offer the world. I just long for the day so much where the church realizes who she is, and what she has to offer the world. What is it that you have to give to the world? Why are you afraid to be fully who you are? I'd really encourage you to wrestle with that question. Because until you are at peace with who you are, I don't think you can fully give what God has given you to give. I don't believe that you'll truly be alive until you find joy in the life you've been given. I love who I am, I wouldn't ever want to be anyone else. And neither should you.

I know that for me, this week was life-changing. I'm so much more aware of who He's made me to be, and I know that He's given me permission to be all that I am in fullness with confidence. No more, but absolutely no less. And He's giving you permission too...will you take it?

Mother Theresa said it best: "We must never forget that we are bound toward perfection and should aim ceaselessly at it."

Blessings,
Lara

To Lebaonon and Beyond!

For those of you who are not on my email, address list here is my support letter! Thank you for considering investing in this amazing oportunity! :)

Dear Family and Friends,

 I've had the honor this year of going to the Bethel School of Ministry here in Redding, California something that I didn't plan on doing when I moved to California. I've written in my past emails that it is the best thing that I never knew I needed, and that is certainly true. As part of our school, we get to go on missions trips in the Spring apart from our tuition. At the time of choosing my missions trip I still had over a thousand dollars left to pay on my tuition here at school. As we were choosing missions trips, I was really tempted to pick trips that were only state-side, making them cheaper than international trips. While this would have been great, and ministry is so needed anywhere and in every context, after spending time with the Lord I realized I was choosing those out of fear, and not because I was feeling called to those places. Since being here the Lord has really been stirring my heart more and more for the nations. For probably the last 8 years or so I have been praying more specifically and feeling more drawn to the culture of the Middle East. I have fallen in love more specifically with the women of that culture and read a lot of their stories. Even though I have always had a desire to get to the Middle East, it has always been something that I viewed as far off, somewhere I would go when I was older and 'more experienced.' However, as I was reading through the mission trips choices, 3 of M.E. countries stood out to me. With faith, I chose the countries I felt like Holy Spirit was highlighting to me, not the countries that my bank account told me I could go to.

I love how God works...a week later my tuition got paid off in full, and a month later I found out that God wanted to turn a far off dream, into a reality today. March 29-April 12 I am planning on going to Lebanon with a group of 15 from the school. For those of you who don't have the Middle East memorized, Lebanon is the country in between Israel and Syria along the Mediterranean Sea. While in country, we will be partnering with a ministry that is already established in country called Tent of Praise to serve their vision in the area. We will be working to bring the love of God from the top of the Lebanon Mountain Range to the edge of the Mediterranean Sea, from villages to Universities. We will work to encourage the local churches, praying with them for breakthrough and also partnering with them in outreaches. We will also be doing street ministry and stepping out in faith to see amazing things happen in people's lives as they're touched by the love of God. And what better way to pray into both Syria and Israel than from the country that shares a border in one trip?

The heart and passion of the Bethel Mission Trips Department is to see the sons and daughters of God in all the nations awaken to His goodness and love. As children of Heaven, we have access to His Kingdom and demonstrate His love, glory, and power in all aspects of society. Their strategy is to raise up a generation of world changers in their own nations to begin to run with their God-given inheritance to bring heaven to earth and transform their nation. This trip, through Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry (BSSM), ultimately reflects the vision of the Bethel Mission Trips Department and I am excited to have a part along with 1,100 of my classmates. :)

It is in great humility that I ask if you would like to partner with me once again to make this a reality. I am so excited already about what God is going to do. It is in my heart to see as many people in the world burning with realization of who they are and just how much God loves them. I am asking that you seek the Lord if and how you are to give, whether financially or through prayer. The trip altogether is $2645, and I need to raise at least $1445 by JANUARY 22nd in order to secure my plane ticket. Because of amazing people like you, I have already been able to raise $400 of that! THANK YOU! I will need to raise the remaining $1200 by February 26th. If you would like to give, just follow these instructions:

 

Financial gifts may be made online at https://missiontrips.ibethel.org. (this is tax deductible if needed) Go to 'Give today' and under 'Find a traveler' type student's  name, select it and fill out payment information. 

If online payment is not an option, check donations can be made payable to Bethel Church and mailed to the following address:  

Bethel Mission Trips Department

915 Twin View Blvd.,

Redding, CA 96003.  ( Please include a note with the donation designating which student’s trip 

you are supporting.) 

I also cannot tell you how much I value your prayers. I do realize very much the area I am walking into willingly and the dangers there are. I don't pretend to be naive, but I do know who God is, and I do know what kind of people are praying for me. The covering you create is too great to place a value on. I know that I (and probably my mother this time around) value your prayers very much. They are rich, and very felt. 

I know that an email cannot tell you all how excited I am for this trip. It feels like the beginning of something completely new for me. Thank you so much for how you've supported me as I travel to the near places and the not-so-near ones trying to be obedient, and to learn how to trust. While I don't know exactly how far He'll lead me, it is so comforting to know the support I have. Thank you for considering investing and partnering with what I know the Lord is doing in my life. My breakthroughs are always yours, and my blessings I pray will be given to you 100 times over. I love you all and will keep you updated on this great adventure of dreams coming true!

God bless!

Lara

(if you have any questions, my phone number is (319) 750-2385)

2013/2012 pondering and randomness

So those of you who know me best know that I love to dream. I love to think about what God can do, what's in my heart to do and what He's going to do that's 'better than I can even ask or imagine.' Well it's 13 days into 2013 and until last night I'd done none of that for this new year. That's pretty much unheard of in my world. I love to dream. I love to help other people dream, plan and create. So why the hod up this new year?
Of all the wild years, I think 2012 topped them for me. I never had as many surprises, twists and turns. I've never been so challenged both in good ways and in harder ways. I've laughed so hard, cried so deep, and everything in between. As I look back on my last year I don't even recognize the person who's sitting in this chair; or rather the person who was sitting in this chair a year ago. I've come a far  and yet I'm more fully aware more than ever of how far I have to go. 12 months ago I had just moved here, no idea really why except I heard 'go' and had an open door. 2012 has been a crazy ride.

Some of the highlights:
-moved to redding, ca
-had a job within 5 days of moving here
-got to go to Ireland for 9 days to pray and enjoy that beautiful land
-have the honor of helping one or my spiritual moms with her ministry
-the morning after asking The Lord for another source of income got called back for a second job
-completely reprinted a whole house, and had the joy of preparing it for its owner.
-had a dream that I should go back to school at a time when resources were quite low
-saw God provide for all of my schooling
-had the largest financial breakthrough of my life which enabled me to go home for Christmas to my family
-got word that I get to go on a missions trip to the Middle East this spring fulfilling a dream in my heart that almost no one knew about.
-had a week with my parents
-was physically healed of a 2 week long headache
-have had more dreams birthed in me this year than my whole life combined
-have had so many wonderful people come visit! :)
-get to go to school, specifically, revival group with some of the most amazing, radical, lovely people on the face or the planet from all over the planet.

S yeah, I'm sure I missed a whole bunch of things, but where do you start? I'm learning more and more about how to dream with passion and intentionality but also how to give those dreams back to The Lord and TRUSTING Him with them. (Go figure, it still has to do with trust) when we can lay down our rights to be in control of everything, it's amazing what He can do. I just really didn't think I wanted or needed to be in school but I'm so very glad that it happened. I'm so very glad that I was so wrong.

So what's this got to do with 2013? Or anything for that matter? I'm not 100% sure. I do have things I would love to see happen in the coming year. I have goals and hopes and dreams that are so crazy that unless I give them to God are downright impossible. Impossible. Previous years of my life I would have looked at this past year and said impossible. I want my life to be impossible. This happens by taking my life and completely placing it in His hands. More than anything I want to stay right at his feet. Taking what He gives me and putting it back under His control. Allowing Him to take me to places I never planned. I long for 2013 to be a year that I learn more and more how to pour myself outas a drink offering to Him. To allow Him to overcome me, to trust Him with my heart, and to give Him away to everyone that I meet.

Well, if that wasn't the most incongruent blog I've written I don't know what is.

Also, I apologize for mistakes, for some reason I can't go back and edit. :( weird.

Love you all!
-Lara