I haven't been doing a very good job lately at fighting the feelings of being overwhelmed. I have many reasons to feel overwhelmed: working 2 jobs, going to school. Working 2 jobs while going to school. Learning after 3 months, once again, how to have roommates and little alone time (thanks, girls for the grace!) Being financially in a place where I am still in need of miracles to pay off my tuition. Being 29+ hours from the people I love the most and watching them continue to do life without me. Watching nieces and nephews growing up and knowing I am missing so much. Lots of reasons. Lots of excuses to be overrun by tiredness, fatigue, frustration, doubt and hopelessness. And yet tonight, I was overwhelmed by the simplicity He longs for when we come to Him. He loves when we're just simply there.
Tonight a song with 2 chords spoke to me in such a way, it will be very hard to explain it at all to you...but I must try. As musicians and writers we are always trying to make things as good and perfected as we can possibly get them. Like, if we wrote a song every day, we would only want to present the song to the general population that we wrote on our very best day. We like things to be coherent, to flow well, and just to be pretty. We want to come off as eloquently as possible. We want to leave people in awe. We all write differently. I usually start with several lyrics and maybe a small tune. I get it flowing nicely and then I will interject different chords or structures to make it sound richer or fuller. Now, obviously I have never come even relatively close to a great song, otherwise you would have heard of me (actually not sure of that with our current system for music writing). And so I realize that with some of you what I say has little weight, but this is how it works for the most part. We work, and we rework tweaking whatever we can.
I have a song that I wrote about a year ago that drives me nuts. No matter how hard I try. No matter what I ask God, the stinking song will not go past 2 chords. The lyrics will not expound. The fullness stays the same. And yet, the emotional response is always the same. The song rocks me every. single. time. I can't help it. It's ridiculous. Every time I look for more, and no more comes.
And tonight, the simplicity, and the lyrics completely apprehended me from the business/stress/worry/ridiculousness that was my past few days. Fact is, when we come before God we could play one chord over and over and He would be so pleased that we turned towards Him. This isn't a lesson on perfectionism (though it could be), just a lesson in making sure we never overcomplicate it with Him. 2 chords and an open heart. That's all I needed tonight for my whole perspective on life to change. Just simply being with Him is what He longs for, what He yearns for...what He came and died on the cross for. It amazes me.
Tonight, as a writer I was grateful for a simple song, full of simple, honest truth that led me straight to His heart. And the invitation awaits for you. What worries and stresses are keeping you from drawing yourself into Him? Because I guarantee it's not worth it. He is simple to come to. "Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest."
"Don't let my words get in the way of what my heart longs to say. Don't let my mind complicate these thoughts that I want to say to you, Jesus. Oh, I love you more, I love you more, I love you more than words can say, Jesus."
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